“If I must die, let it bring hope, let it be a tale.”
— Refaat Alareer
If I Must Die: Poetry & Prose by Refaat Alareer.
This rich, elegiac compilation of work from the late Palestinian poet and professor, Refaat Alareer (1979-2023), brings together his marvelous poetry and deeply human writing about literature, teaching, politics, and family.
The renowned poet and literature professor Refaat Alareer was killed by an Israeli airstrike in Gaza City alongside his brother, sister, and nephews in December 2023. He was just forty-four years old, but had already established a worldwide reputation that was further enhanced when, in the wake of his death, the poem that gives this book its title became a global sensation. “If I Must Die” is included here, alongside Refaat’s other poetry.
Refaat wrote extensively about a range of topics: teaching Shakespeare and the way Shylock could be appreciated by young Palestinian students; the horrors of living under repeated brutal assaults in Gaza, one of which, in 2014, killed another of his brothers; and the generosity of Palestinians to each other, fighting, in the face of it all, to be the one paying at the supermarket checkout.
Such pieces, some never before published, have been curated here by one of Refaat’s closest friends and collaborators. This collection forms a fitting testament to a remarkable writer, educator, and activist, one whose voice will not be silenced by death but will continue to assert the power of learning and humanism in the face of barbarity.
“Refaat left us, but his word must not.”
—Mosab Abu Toha
Refaat Alareer gained his PhD with a dissertation on the poetry of John Donne. He taught English Literature at the Islamic University of Gaza, now destroyed. He is the editor of two collections of writing by his students, Gaza Writes Back and Gaza Unsilenced (both published by Just World Books). His journalism featured in The New York Times, and he appeared on the BBC, ABC News, and Democracy Now. He was a volunteer at the Gaza Zoo.
Excerpts from the book by Dr. Alareer:
If I Must Die, Let It Be a Tale
If I must die,
you must live
to tell my story
to sell my things
to buy a piece of cloth
and some strings,
(make it white with a long tail)
so that a child, somewhere in Gaza
while looking heaven in the eye
awaiting his dad who left in a blaze—
and bid no one farewell
not even to his flesh
not even to himself—
sees the kite, my kite you made, flying up above
and thinks for a moment an angel is there
bringing back love
If I must die
let it bring hope
let it be a tale
*
My grandmother would tell me to put on a heavy sweater because it would rain. And it would rain! She, like all Palestinian elderly, had a unique sense, an understanding of the earth, wind, trees, and rain. The elderly knew when to pick olives for pickling or for oil. I was always envious of that.
Sorry, Grandma. We have instead become attuned to the vagaries of war. This heavy guest visits us uninvited, unwelcomed, and undesired, perches on our chests and breaths, and then claims the lives of many, in the hundreds and thousands…
Death and war. War and Death. These two are persona non grata, yet we can’t force them to leave. To let us be.
*
Over the Wall
“There,” points Grandma.
She had a tent that was a home.
She had a goat and a camel.
She had a rake and a fork and a trowel.
She had a machete and a watering can.
She had a grove and two hundred plants.
She had a child and another one and another one.
***
“There,” she insists.
I could not see
Because of the wall.
I could not hear
Because of the noise.
I could not smell
Because of the powder.
***
But I can always tell,
I am sure of Grandma
Who always was
And is still
And will always be.
She smells like soil.
And smiles like soil.
And blinks like soil
When touched by rain.
***
She has a house that is a tent
She has a key
And a memory.
She has a hope
And two hundred offspring.
***
Grandma is here
But lives there.
“Over there!”
*
I’m an academic. Probably the toughest thing I have at home is an Expo marker. But if the Israelis invade, if the paratroopers charge at us, going from door to door, to massacre us, I am going to use that marker to throw it at the Israeli soldiers, even if that is the last thing that I do.
Actress Debra Winger reads from If I Must Die on the anniversary of his death (December 06, 2024)
If I Must Die: Poetry and Prose (December 10, 2024)
by Refaat Alareer (Author), Yousef M. Aljamal (Compiler), Susan Abulhawa (Foreword)
